I am once again attempting to get caught up on my mountains of paperwork (even with the school’s shortage of paper, the piles on my desk never quite disappear… curious, isn’t it?) while listening to the greatest singer/songwriter of this (or any) generation and I was staggered to realize something new; Neil Diamond is a damn liar who would say anything to sell a record.
So good to me
It was all I hoped it would be
This is a slap in the face. I simply don’t understand how Neil could have gotten away with this blatant lie. Was he bought out by the AFL-CIO in an attempt to get people to show up for work? Is Neil nothing more than a shill for Corporate America?
Are there no heroes left? When MC Hammer went broke a little piece inside of me died, but I was able to recover. When I discovered that Manilli and Vanilli were worse singers than the hacks that sang their songs, I was so depressed that I couldn’t get out of bed for a week. When Limp Bizkit formed a complete thought without dropping the F bomb, I tried to end it by chugging a whole bottle of Flintstones Chewables.
The only thing that has kept me going this whole time was the thought that there was one man out there still keeping it real. In his sequined jackets and leatherette pants, Neil Diamond was still the Voice of the People and he somehow made everything bearable.
Now that he’s been unmasked as just another aging sellout, I don’t know where I’ll find the strength to go on. Perhaps this is the eventual end of all bards; that it is discovered that they are not prophets or sages, but mere entertainers and fools. Or maybe not; we still have LLCoolJ!